All Gods High
Entries about Kevin
September 18, 2014
I signed up with the drama club today. There’s this guy named Kevin that looks like Usher who made fun of me for not being able to move a plywood prop. He started calling me Bigman Bo and made up a song about how I bench press cotton balls. It pissed me off, but I didn’t say anything. I figure if I ignore him, maybe he’ll quit.
September 29, 2014
“Bigman Bo” now has three verses and half the drama club knows the words. Thing is, Kevin’s just about as skinny as me… it’s just that he never DOES anything. He coasts by on making people laugh and I never see him do a lick of work. I bet he couldn’t have moved that prop that started this whole thing… I wish I could challenge him to move it himself, but I know how that would work out… he’s got that je ne sais quoi that lets him get out of awkward situations. Hell, I bet he has no idea what it’s like to be humiliated.
October 14, 2014
Got him! I swung a sandbag onto Kevin’s coat when his back was turned, then everybody saw him flail about trying to get free while I leaned on the pulley. When he asked me to raise the pulley, I improvised a rap about him being the Sandman Stuckinplace. I got a round of applause… I think all the people Kevin has made fun of were happy to see the tables turned a little bit.
November 10, 2014
Drama club had improv practice today, and I got in a four person group with Iris, Kevin, and Tina. Every goddamn scene Kevin made me either gay or in love with Iris. I tried to do some turnarounds, but Kevin’s… je ne sais quoi just keeps him one step ahead of me. I feel like I’m smarter than him, but he’s just… faster on his feet, or something. The closest I got was accidentally giving him an opening to make out with Iris while I played gay supportive friend for Tina. It sucked. I may not like Iris, but it sure doesn’t feel like winning when somebody else gets to kiss her while I get sidelined…
November 20, 2014
I’m like Doctor Doom to Kevin’s Mister Fantastic. He may be faster than me, but given time to prepare, I can destroy his whole world.
I convinced Mark that Kevin’s been trying to get his attention all year. Then I got Kevin to make fun of me in front of Mark, which I’d set up in advance as “trying to make him jealous”. It paid off during Improv. Kevin turned about as white as I am when he had to kiss Mark and the kiss didn’t end on time.
November 21, 2014
Kevin stopped with the “Bigman Bo” stuff. He calls me Ghostface Killah now, which is pretty cool. I think we have an understanding.